The Contestants

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Disqualified For Cheating

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Disqualified For Being Distracted

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First Runner Up

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And The Winner Is

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Urban Dictionary:

one legged man in an ass kicking contest
Attempting to accomplish a goal (kick ass) with some possible success only to wind up falling on your own ass. Having to try harder than the average person to reach the same success. A repeated accomplishment followed up by repeated embarrassing failures.

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