I’m Tired

http://www.painnewsnetwork.org/stories/2016/3/3/sherris-story-a-final-plea-for-help

“Several documents found inside the location underscored her pain, suffering and suicidal ideations,” reads the coroner’s report. “A check of the decedent’s laptop also contained a pictured document written by the decedent titled ‘Why I Killed Myself’ by Sherri Little.”

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/ex-nyc-journalist-sarah-kershaw-planned-life-article-1.2545443

The former New York journalist who was found dead in her home in the Dominican Republic told friends that she planned to end her life, according to reports. Sarah Kershaw, 49, was found with a plastic bag tied over her head and pill bottles beside her…  The writer had been suffering from chronic pain due to occipital neuralgia…

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I can feel it

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flying away

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my will to live

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my will to stay

You Are One Left Turn From Eternal Happiness

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I passed this sign while searching for apartments. The happiness it’s referring to has to do with food (although I forget what kind). It was this sign that told me it was time for a visit to the ducks at a local wetlands park. (Because I’m waiting for the ducks to tell me the secret to eternal happiness.)

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Why?

But the snobbish ducks didn’t want anything to do with me, so I made a left turn, where I found that someone had kindly left a butterfly sticker (on the back of a sign) for me to enjoy.

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And I found some dancing Cottonwoods. (Shake it, dudes!)

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And lovers parking. (If the car’s a rockin’…)

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I made another turn, and found what looks like…

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The Death Of The American Dream

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Another turn took me down a bridge…

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And onto a path, where I passed a few people, but for the most part, it was empty…

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Until an old man pedaled by… (Show off.)

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Making me wonder why someone hasn’t invented a more comfortable bike seat.

It was a longer walk than I had intended (stupid ducks), but it felt good to stretch my legs. Still, I’ve been paying for it ever since (ducks suck).

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Just kidding. 🙂  Of course ducks don’t suck.

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Some of my best friends are ducks.

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Selfie of the day:

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Ballsy

From Google:

ballsy:  tough and courageous
“a cool, ballsy woman who could not be intimidated”

From Dictionary.com:

ballsy:  boldly aggressive or courageous
“a ballsy gal who isn’t afraid of anyone”

“I’m ballsy. Well, sometimes I’m ballsy.”  Norah Jones

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(Photos taken 1/27/2016.)

Okay, I went a little crazy with the ball photos, but I’m blaming that on my obsession with balls. Thanks for viewing. 🙂

I just lost 10 pounds

It’s been a couple of years since I had my hair cut — the expense has become more of a luxury than a necessity. But with my coupon for a free haircut at Sport Clips in my hand, I finally got rid of all my freaking hair.

It’s hard to take pictures of your own hair:

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Let’s just say I looked (kinda) like this:

http://dangerousminds.net/comments/photos_of_victorian_women_and_their_long-ass_hair

longhair13sdfsdfsdfsdfsd

And now my head is 10 pounds lighter. Unfortunately, you get what you pay for (a tip of $10), so it’s not the best haircut. I’m sitting here wondering if I’ve had a worse cut, but I can’t remember… I’m thinking, probably not. Not like I care. 🙂

I was worried that I’d be sitting around with a bunch of men at Sport Clips, waiting to get my haircut while having to watch sports. Thankfully, I didn’t have to wait. While the young lady was getting rid of all my hair, I got to watch a young, blonde woman — wearing a black cocktail dress and displaying quite a bit of cleavage — talk about football with a couple of dudes in suits and ties. ESPN, what fun.

I asked the young woman cutting my hair, do you have to watch sports all day long? And can you watch women’s sports, like tennis? She’s like, yeah, sports all day, every day, and no women’s tennis. Guys don’t like women’s sports. I’m like, well, they’re missing out — have you seen Serena Williams swing a tennis racket?

I also asked her if she had seen the movie Concussion, which she had not, but we both agreed that with Will Smith as the lead, it was bound to be a great movie. And I assured her it was — great acting, along with an interesting story.

And now I have a funky haircut and my neck and back are itchy. But I don’t care, because I’m 10 pounds lighter. Now I can eat more desserts without really gaining a pound. 🙂

My Death Plans

I died once, so I’ve probably thought about death more than the average person. Well, obviously I didn’t die, but I was told my heart stopped and I was clinically dead. So, yeah, I’ve been dead before.

The subject of death plans recently came up here:

An important question

https://seachysuffers.wordpress.com/2016/01/12/death-it-will-get-me-and-you-so-why-is-it-taboo/

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Most of us will not get to choose how we die (even though most of us have chosen the way we’ve lived, which doesn’t seem fair). But, unless you’re at death’s door, there’s no way to tell when it’s our time. So, it only makes sense to be prepared for the inevitable.

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I guess a lot of people will visit an attorney to have legal documents prepared, like a will. But that’s really for people with money or property, not really for poor people, like me. Now you can find a lot of legal documents online, which you can prepare yourself, only needing to pay for a notary. In fact, hospitals have some legal documents (like DNRs) for patients to access, hopefully with an attorney available to answer questions at no charge. Now that Medicare is covering end-of-life counseling, legal assistance should become more readily available to the public.

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So, really, all I need to worry about is what I want to happen after I’m gone. That’s easy, because I don’t want to be confined in a coffin and buried under the ground — leaving cremation as the only other option. (Not that I’d want another option, like being covered in chocolate and sent into space in a cryochamber.)

But, I don’t want my ashes confined in an urn, either. And I don’t like the idea of having my ashes scattered somewhere — I don’t see any point in that, and honestly, it seems kinda gross. No, I’d just like my remains to be taken out with the trash, disposed of in an environmentally-clean way…

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Now, if I could save enough money to pay for a cremation before I need this service, that would be great. (But I don’t see that happening.)

As for funerals, I don’t like them. At one time, I thought it would be nice to request a party to celebrate my life after I die, but I no longer like that idea. Celebrate my life while I’m living — don’t wait until after I’m gone.

So, my death plans are cremation and no funeral. I do so hereby swear (to my blog), on this, the 12th day of January, 2016.

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Grover And I Say Hi!

I had to make my tri-monthly trip to the drug store for Claritin-D today. (Thanks, DEA.)

Lucky for me, I had Grover along for the drive.

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I can only assume that I have a secret admirer who wanted to brighten my day.

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So, instead of removing Grover, I allowed him to accompany me to Walgreens.

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He was bored, so I took him to visit my mountain.

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And a good time was had by all. (Turns out, Grover has access to some great bud.)

Arriving home, I decided that Grover and I are going to be best friends. (After all, I can’t remember the last time I washed my car.)

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Grover and I say Hi! 🙂

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(Photos taken today.)

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In The Background #2

New Year’s Day in the Q began covered by one huge cloud, but it’s now beginning to clear up, and I see a few balloons flying in the background of my awesome mountain. I’m listening to Lady Gaga… I’ve got black beans and rice on the stove and tortillas warming in the oven… In other words, Bud and I are having a good day. 🙂

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(Photos taken on New Year’s Eve.)