Do you agree to try? Yes, yes, I’ll try. Okay then…
Think of something good… Like desserts. What do you want to bake next? Maybe peanut butter chocolate brownie pie, is there such a thing? I love… what are they called? Oh yeah, graham crackers. I love graham crackers. Or maybe chocolate chip pumpkin bread. I’ve never tried to make chocolate mousse, how about that? No cream cheese in the house, remember?
Okay, that’s not working. Why don’t you try doing your old gymnastics routines in your head? Beam, bars, floor exercise… Remember vaulting and how it felt to fly over the horse? How it felt to do a side split leap, hanging for just a split second in the air? Let’s create our own new floor routine, how about it?
Not working either. Deep breath in, slow exhale out. Listen to the James Taylor CD playing on your DVD player. Concentrate on the music. Wait, all I hear is the buzzing in my ears… That’s because the DVD player is on its last legs and doesn’t always work. Lean over, grab the controls, eject, and press play again.
I’m thirsty. Too bad, we’re trying to sleep here. My head hurts. Too bad, you just took some aspirin an hour ago…
Even though the honeysuckle isn’t blooming yet, remember the smell? Breathe in deeply… Can you smell it? Imagine bending down and smelling a rose. Breathe in… slowly exhale.
Look, falling asleep isn’t that hard to do. As Nike says, just freakin’ do it already! Deep breath in…
Exhale… and I’m up. No sleep for me.
All Things Chronic 
No peanut butter.
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Maybe you could try to hypnotize me again? 🙂
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My dad was fond of saying that people don’t have trouble sleeping, they just haven’t done enough to be tired. Karma got him though and he was at the doc asap to get his ambien!
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I tried Ambien and Lunesta… They didn’t do anything for me. But somehow, now that I know your dad has trouble sleeping too (and that he kinda deserves it), I feel a little bit better. 🙂
Wonder what I did to Karma for it to f*ck with me like this?
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My doc tried me on both of those, then trazadone, something I can’t remember, then added klonopin to the Ambien (most recent), and now the psychiatrist has me taking an additional mood stabilizer at night for sleep. We see how that’s working out 🙂
Karma and you and me (I’d think, unless I did something godawful by the time I was 7)-nothing.
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Transitions require energy. It is quite possible to become too weary to transition to sleep. Too tired to disassociate from pain. Too exhausted to prevent the fatigue from generating more pain which uses up more non-existent energy aggravating and creating even more pain birthing a self-perpetuating cycle. Worse than the damned computer loop ’cause the tension builds. It can become dangerous with ketones building up … and/or the adrenals wrecking everything … and … and …+ +
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I’m not sure, but I think I was born weary. The longest I’ve gone without sleep is about 7 days, and until I get to that point, I’m just not gonna worry about it. However, if I start spouting gibberish on my blog, I’m sure someone will warn me. 🙂
Thanks for the comment, Bear.
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And that French cat was hilarious 🙂
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I wonder if he can pronounce hamburger?
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My favorite Steve Martin movie is Parenthood, but this one brings back some good memories, gracias. 🙂
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